We decided to have a CT scan and skip the biopsy, which was semi invasive, and probably would not have altered our treatment plans either way. We are very happy we did it this way, as at least now she doesn’t have to spend precious energy healing from the biopsy (surgery). The results of the CT were not good. The surgeon does not have the margins he needs to get the entire tumor, putting the chances of less that 50% for a curative surgery even if it were an isolated tumor.
On top of that, a nearby lymph node looks like it probably (75-80% chance) has cancer in it as well…meaning metastasis has started. Upon further questioning, our oncologist summed it up as once it’s in the lymph nodes, it “on the highway”. Radiation is a semi-viable treatment option, but would require 3-4 trips of 4-5 hours (seriously…we live in Seattle and I need to drive to Portland or Pullman…unbelievable). This in itself isn’t a showstopper, but because it’s likely affecting a nerve, the odds that it will dull the pain significantly are low (somewhere in the 20-40% range), and even if it did, we’re looking at 3-4 months. Not to mention the risk of colitis if we make it more than a few months.
We could continue to grasp at straws, but the long term prognosis is grim, which brings me to what really matters. NOW! It’s ridiculously hard not to be overwhelmed by the idea that my baby will probably not be here for the holidays, and I can’t say I am great at this yet. But this is Osa’s gift to us. She’s helping us realize that we need to focus on what is truly important, the only thing that we really have control over. Today, as in right now, this very moment! She has helped me realize that I have spent far too much time focusing on things like retirement, a potential future vacation home, trips to far off destinations, stock portfolios, promotions at work, social media, etc. Those things deserve some thought, for sure, but not at the cost of being truly present with my family, my beautiful wife, kids, and dogs. That’s the beauty of dogs, they don’t give a rip about tomorrow, probably don’t even understand the concept. That’s the gift that Osa is sharing with me. It’s a hard lesson, but also a beautiful one.
Here are some photos of my professor in the moment. On that note, I’m out!
Professor Osa is an outstanding teacher! And her humans are outstanding students! Such a great team!!
No, this isn’t the news you want to hear. You have given careful thought to what’s best for Osa. She knows everything you do is for her.
We can’t say this enough around here…no dog has a timeframe on their butts. Statistics mean very little and prognosis even means less. Time after time we’ve see dogs given “X” amount of time, only to happily exceed it!
There is still a chance that lymph nodes are NOT involved too. I stress that because my Happy Hannah supposedly had node involvement and that “changed” her prognosis. Well, we had a WONDERFUL bonus time of over one year!!
You certainly can check out holistic options too. This site is loaded with information AND success stories.
But Professor Osa is so right…none of that really matters anyway once you make a commitment to live in the NOW!
Osa is going to have THE best time having her HUGE bucket list filled everday for a very long time! Take lots and lots of photos of her soaking up all that lovingnand spoiling!
Speaking of photos, she is BEAUTIFUL! And she really does have a very “wise” expression…wise and happy! I love the banner at the top of her blog…two very adorable pups.
Osa still has some more great life lessons for you to learn. Her mission is not done here yet. She’s not going anywhere anytime soon.
You love Osa soooo much and you will be able to stay in the present as a result! You will not let anything interfere with your time together. Your love for her will keep you focused on the present.
She is feeling good and that’s all that matters.
Thank you for sharing some of Professor Osa’s life lessons. We’ve all benefited as a result. She is so very lucky to have you as her human. Of course, she picked you anyway, so she knew exactly what she was doing! She knew, through you, she would know what love and joy felt like every single day with you.
Look forward to more pictures when you can.
Sending lots and lots of love…and a gallon of ice cream for her bucket list!
Sally and Alumni Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle too!
Wow, such thoughtful words. I can’t thank you enough for your positivity and perspective, not to mention the good vibes!
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
I’m so sorry. This is never what we expect from the miracle of modern medicine, and my heart breaks that you guys are on such a tough path, medically speaking.
But spiritually, you’ve got that down. It’s a tough education but in the long run it changes you for the better. We discovered that as Jerry’s cancer progressed, and shared a lot in our Tripawds News blog. Here’s one post you may find comfort in:
http://tripawds.com/2008/05/19/buying-time-on-an-emotional-budget/
Please know we are here for you. Call the helpline, pop into the Forums or the chat, you are never alone.
Great post about the tao of dogs. Thank you so much for being there for all of us in our times of struggle, it means a lot.
Bless your heart. I can so relate to “grasping at straws”, but that’s what we do.
That’s what we do when we love with all our heart.
That’s what we do when moments are cherished.
Osa has no concept of time. Living large here or at the Bridge will be seamless for her. The heartbreak is our burden.
Like Sally says, they don’t have an expiration date stamped on their hineys, but even a prognosis of 3-4 months is a long time on the doggy calendar. And, if given the chance, you know she’ll fill every minute of it by your side.
xoxo
Yes, I believe you are right. She is living large every day. I just wish I could ease her pain better than we have been. We are trying some new things starting this week, so we will keep y’all posted. I’ll post about the treatments we decide on.
Just hopped over to Jerry’s “the Tao” link…always good to be reminded of “the Tao of dogs” that Osa already embraces.
Great reminder fro. Pam/Harmony that, when the time comes, Osa’s transition to the Bridgewill be seamless for her….no time soon tbough!!
With love,
Sally and Alumni Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle too!
I am sorry you have gotten this tough news. Remember prognosis and “time given” is always an estimate. We never know how long they have or we have for that matter. The vets and specialists have to give those numbers. We just never know.
You have gotten some good advice from some great people.
hugs
Michelle & Angel Sassy
Yes I have, including you. Thank you.